O&K 7

*5awla*

Now he leaves me again , he keeps hurting me OVER and OVER again!
What does he want from me! Why does he keep doing this why?!
I'm really sick of this, fuck him and fuck his love.

I threw his blanket away and I stood up. I wiped the tears that were about to fall down my cheeks.
I'm not going to cry anymore, I'm not going to feel bad or feel devestated.

Before I open the door, I looked back at his room. I don't know what happened to me suddenly, I didn't have the courage to leave. His room reminds me of him, its my lovers places. It keeps me warm and safe. I removed my hand from the doors handle and went to his closet.
I grabbed a hoddie that he'd always wear w '6maaith l 7'6ni!
Aah his smell, his perfume , it makes me go insane.

Tears appeared again , I can't control myself. Astwi wayd 7saash youm "3mair" is in the problem.

I keep telling myself to be strong , to don't ever let a guy do this to me but he's not any guy, he's my only guy. I'm not the kind of person that would cry over stupid love but again its not like any other love.
3mair had always been my whole life.
If I playback my whole life , you would see him everywhere. He was with me from the age of 2 lain al7een.

But ill try to act strong.

3afra; 3maaairr!!!!! Khawlaaa !!!!! Where are u!! Dinner is ready!

3afoor's voice woke me up , it made me shiver. If she enters and sees this , she's gonna make a joke out of it. She doesn't believe in us and I don't blame her. I don't believe in us either , he's just a misery that I don't wanna keep up with anymore.

I wiped my tears and I vowed not to cry over him ever again. Its not the first time enh yjr7ni w I bet it wouldn't be the last time. Let him leave just go to fucking america and don't come back!

I threw his hoddie away and I hesitated whether to open the door. Maba ashoofh. Please god don't make this more awkward.

I slowly pressed on the door's handle and took a small peek.

I captured 7mood and 3afoor but no sign of the ass.
I felt releaved and I went to sit down next to 3afoor.

I grabbed a slice of pizza and grabbed the remote to change that boring channel 7mood had on.

3afra; feeling better 7ayati?

5awla; yup way way better! Actually I'm feeling happy like this heavy weight is not there anymore

3afra; woow kl ha mn elrgad

5awla; yup

I tried not to cry , I tried to lie and act strong. I don't wanna be the weak 5awla anymore. I want to change , I want to live my life. My life doesn't revolve around 3mair alx bs , It needs others. I need to open my heart and not be afraid. I need to socialize and enjoy my life without his presence.

7mood; agool 5awool

5awla; goool 7mood goool allah y5leeek gool

I laughed and 3afra laughed too

3afra; wayh 5awool shu estwabch hahah:p

5awla; 3n la ygool bs!

We laughed again and he gave us the nastiest look ever.

M7md; mno sm7lch t'3yren el8anah w t6nzain b3d 7'6rtch?

5awla; kaify -.-"

3afra; 3ad 7mood ely knt etshoofh is the definition of boredom.

M7md; 3afoor , take my side babe. Were in this together B)

3afra; enshallah 7aaayaaatiiiii

M7md; 7beebti gooly 7g bnt 5altch t36eeeni elremote

3afra; mn 3yoon 7beebtk wallah

I laughed all along , they do this ALWAYS. They act all lovey dovey and che but let me tell u its FUNNY!

Like u see 3afraaa flirting , which u would never get to see always. She's always serious w mathmha hal swalf but when she does it , OMG !

5awla; bs walla b6ni 3wrni mn el'67k ! Hahahaha

3afra; 36i elremotr 7g 7beebi yalla :@@@

I couldn't even move mn el'67k so she had to get up w ta5th elremote broo7ha! I knew they wanted to laugh so hard but holding it in.

3afra went to m7md , kissed his cheeks

3afra; hak 7beebi

M7md; fdaaitch 7ubyy

I started calming down w 6al3thm -.-

5awla; ok now stop its so EWW!

3afra; eww wayhch enzeen. Aayh 7moodi shoof shu etgool hay

She did that sad puppy face and m7md sawa 3mrh m39b w awwnh planning to hit me with the pillow

I ran away while laughing at my stupid very very stupid cousins. I heard them laughing too.

I went out to the beach , it was really dark. I wondered where he was. Mn kthr el'67k I slightly forgot about him for a minute.
I walked for what seemed like ages. My legs were hurting me mn elmashi but it was worth it.
Eljaw rw3aa w hdoo2 mashay 7d, next to our beach house shay house mal shabab kwaityeen.
Eyoon from time to time. I love them, they're so funny but I never get to hang out l2nh 3mair may5leeni. They're like super hot and super sweet. I miss them b3d .. mn zmaan ma shftthm. I walked by their house and I saw some open lights. I wondered if they where their but it couldn't be. Maybe 7d dash yn'6f or shay l2nh Rose she comes and cleans every beach house when she's told so by her bosses so I guess its rose.

I was heading back to our beach house , I got really scared and started running. A5aaaf mn eldarkness

While I was running , I bumped into something hard and strong l draja enh rasi 3wrni w 7ta jsmi -,-"

5awla; matshoof!!!!

I started screaming even though I didn't know mno kan hal ensan

***; la ashoof bs enty matshoofen

5awla; 3mair:o

3mair; wain knti?

5awla; may59k

I left him and started walking forward but he held my arm and pushed me back infront of him

3mair; 5awla latklmeni che

5awla; hdd eydy 3mair

3mair; as2lch wain knti

I tried to let go of my hand , ylst arfsh w a'6rbh l2ni 9dg wayd knt m39bh mnh!

5awla; LEAVE ME ALONE!

3mair: 5AWLA!

And I froze.

No words could describe my fear al7en.

5awla; en zen h d ni

3mair; 2a5r mrh bs2lch 5awool

5awla; KNT ATMSHA enzen!

3mair; ttmshain n9 ellaail broo7ch?

5awla; hayh shu feeha

He came very close to me , his face SO CLOSE to mine and he whispered

3mair; youm ana aklmch , la trad'deen

I coudlnt reply now , I just looked at him , I looked at his eyes. He looked mad.

I closed my eyes and I whispered back.

5awla; enta may59k feni ok! Enth 2a5r wa7d trms !

He came closer
He grabbed my arm and he started pushing me behind our beach house to the wall.
I was really scared.

His touch made me shiver.

3mair; lat5leni aswi shay maba asweh 5awla

5awla; shu 3ma ir sh u t ba mn I

he placed his head on my shoulders and into my neck

He started whispering things that made me so weak , I was about to fall.
His breath ya allah

3mair; t3ban ana 5awla t3ban

Lfait rasii w I kissed his ears

5awla; enzen ana hni , gooly shu feek , gooly shu mt3bnk

I was about to cry but no I'm not crying anymore.
I find myself hating him then loving him back again.

I pushed him away and I sat down on the floor because I was just tired mnh , tired mn al'3azh

My face was on my knees. He's not the only one suffering.

He came and sat right next to me.

He started swearing and saying things that I couldn't even understand.

His fone rang fj2a and he wouldn't reply.
His ringtone made me go insane!
Rf3t rasi
5awla; would u just reply y3ne?!

He just looked at me and then looked back down

It kept ringing mostly che an hour or so

I got angry so I grabbed his fone and I answered immedietly

5awla; 3mair is gonna call u back , bye

And when I was about to hang up , the caller spoke and I wish he didn't or may I say " she "

Girl; aloo 7beebi

I looked at him with complete shock , my hands were shaking

The fact that 3mair has a girl in mind and he's playing around with me made me feel sick. Completely sick.

I looked at the fone and there was " shamma ".


Shamma; ohoo aloo 3mair waink


And 3mair was a mess , he looked weak. He didn't even try to explain anything or a9ln does he have anything to explain.

Am I overreacting? Were not even officially a couple 9a7?
But why! He knows that I have feelings for him! Why do this to me 3mair why?

I gave him the fone and I walked away.

I walked away with tears, I vowed not to cry over him but how can I? How can he do this to me just HOW?

I was walking really fast like running not even walking. He didn't even call me or try to stop me.

--

*3mair*

I threw the fone away and I punched the wall a couple of times.

Laish mama , laish che tsween feena ? Laish t76meen wldch , laish tksreen 5a6rh! I can't stay here any longer. I can't hurt her , she makes me want her kl thanya akthr w akthr wna a3wrhaa b af3ali!
Uff ya dnya laish t'6lmeena ..

I can't even say good-bye to her now. I can't look at her walla m7d 7as feeni. A7eenh tt7rani wa7d 5ays 78eer ! Ya allah ufff

I started walking to our beach house , when I was about to go in.
I saw her sitting next to 3afra and crying really hard.

I over heard their conversation ;

3afra; omg 5awool goolyly balach! Aba afhm ma tshb3en 9ya7!

M7md; 5awla shu mstwi ! Yalsa t5wfeena

5awla; t5ylw entu bs t5ylw! 6laa3 y7b w7dh esmhaa shammaa t5ylw :( che yswi feeni cheee ! Ana 5awlaaa che yswi feeni ! 63nii thb7nii jr7nii 3afoor bamoot:( galby y7rgni y3wrnii wayd :( mdri kaif yalsa atnfs a9ln ! Walla t3banah walla w ygooly enh t3baan! Ely t3baan yseer yswi che! Laish lazm yt3bni laish! I wanna go back home! I'm hating this fucking house!

M7md; 5awool I'm gonna tell u now something but ull have to be super strong! I know u can't handle hearing it now bs hal shay lazm tsm3eenh

I knew What m7md was about to say but he shouldn't be the one saying it ...

I entered and all faces looked at me .

She was angry!

5awla; e6l3 br3 3maair ! Mabaaa ashoofk e6l3!

3mair; bs esm3eeni!

5awla; maba mabaaa :( bs 5lni fe 7ali akrhk tfhm shu y3ne akrhk yal ..

3mair; ESM3I ! Hal shay '3a9bn 3ni w shamma 56eebti! '39booni 2a5th'ha '39booni asafr '39booni enzeen! Youm agoolch t3ban y3ne 9dg t3ban ! Tt7rain ely yals yswti 3aybni ! Tt7rain ely yals amr feeh shay s'hl! Tt7rain ench matkoonen 7gi shayy ma y3wr! I've been suffering for 2 months w m7d 7ass feni!

She looked at me , she stood up and came next to me

She held my face and she smiled with tears

5awla; yals tt'3shmr wyay 9a7 3mair! Bs tba t'6aygni w tl3wzni 9a7 ! Hay mb 56ebtk 9a7!

She laughed and she tried wiping her tears

5awla; enth 7gii wna 7gk 9a7? Jawbni 3mair 9a7?

M7md; la mb 9a7 5awool! Mb 9a7! 5ala9 hal shay mstwi mnzman w mb eydh elrayal. Lazm tbt3doon 3n b3'6 w matkbroon elsalfh !

3afra; m7md I'm confused , how can he be engaged w w laish y'39boonh!

3mair; l2nh 7'6rthm ma yt5yloon eny akoon wyaha mthl ma enty ya 3afra ma tt5ylain. The fact that O&K are lovers is not possible to them. 5awla is just my cousins and that's all. She can't be more or less. Hatha 8anoon mama , ma tba 5awla, ma tba O&K!

5awla; omg 3mair I can't take in all of this I can't!

3mair; ylsi 5awool w breathe


5awla; leave me 3mair , u can't ask me to sit down and breathe because u just ruined my whole life. U just broke a dream that I've been wanting my whole life. Its like You just told me that I can't be breathe normally because ur not gonna be with me.

3mair; 7awlt a'3yr rayha 5awla walla el3a'6eem 7awlt ! Mb ra'6ya w umch b3d w ubooch w 5alch w 3mamch. Elkl raf'6 ! Amoot w a3rf laish bs malna n9eeb 7bebti , malna n9eeb.

I kissed her head and she cried even more.

5awla; just go 3mair just go , I wish u happiness.

3mair; bachr msafr ..

5awla; too9l blslama w allah ywfgk

She looked at 3afra

5awla; 3afoor aba argd wadeeni my room

3afra came close to 5awla and she held her hand

3afra; yalla t3ali

I looked at 5awla

3mair; ttm95rain 5awla! Btrgden?

5awla; hayh brgd can u just leave?

3mair; don't worry ill be leaving for a long time

I came close to her , I placed my head on her shoulders

I whispered

3mair; a7bch 5awla

And I kissed her neck before leaving.


--

*5awla*

He just told me the thing that I've always wanted to hear.

I can't let him go

I can't

5awla; 3 ma ir

He turned around and I ran to him , I hugged him a tight hug and I started crying all over again.

5awla; ill miss u 3mair ill miss u :(

He held my face and he looked into my eyes.

3mair; take care enzen 7bebti , lat5len 7d yz3lch w y9y7ch wna mb mawjood. I might take a long time studying there and illl come back married to someone. I know its hard but what can I say 5awool. Forget me as a lover , I don't deserve you , u need someone better.

5awla; wna b3d a7bk , I don't wanna think about it.

He smiled , a tired smile
I looked down and he kissed my eyes and nose.

3mair; m7md ehtm feeha enzen

M7md; 5awla e5ti 3mair , latw9eeni 3laiha

3mair; wnti 3afoor mb kl shwei tl3wzeenha

3afra; enshallah :)

Fdaith walla, he's so caring w awal mrh 3afoor doesn't argue. I feel broken mn da5l that were not meant to be but ill be happy for him. I promise ill not be the bitch that will ruin his marriage and his life.
I promise. I promise.

3mair; have a good night


And with that he left me ...