Diary of F 1

Sometimes there are no words to describe the situation you are in or what your feeling. Tears seem to be the solution for everything right now and I don't know if that makes me weak. I just pray that one day I will wake up to a solution or is the solution right in front of me this whole time and I'm still blinded by my emotions ? Its funny it seems like all the songs I sing along to are talking about my situation, if I can relate to all these people why isn't anyone willing to share an answer to my problems ? Will I look back at this one day and think how naïve was I ? Or look back and say how did I ever get through this ? I’m writing all of this and I don’t even know who I’m directing it to … I’m not even making any sense to myself but I feel as if a weight has been lifted off of my chest for writing this … maybe this is what I needed all along ? Somewhere I can write what I please anonymously ? I think I've been heartbroken for so long that I have become emotionless ... It hurts because I want to be happy I hate my situation right now but what can I do? I have all this anger directed towards him but I know one look from him and all that anger banishes into another world and comes back again when I’m alone with my thoughts… I really miss you , you really are my other half the only person that I’m completely honest with, but you asked me to change so much that I wonder if I am really myself ? Or a product of what you expect me to be? Don’t get me wrong you really did change me for the better, cared for me when I never did...‬


Its funny min kithr ma I think about you I started accidently calling people by your name ? I just hope I’m deep in your thoughts as much as you are in mine ... ya allah what would i give for just another conversation with u ...‬

‪Everyone is telling me to move on but how can i when your a'3la insaan fe 7ayati?‬

 

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